Now hold on. I can sense
disquiet. I can hear fizz of protein shake on keyboard as meat heads
across the globe gasp in amazement.
you scream, can a cage fighting site bestow hero status on a scruffy
weed who dedicated his life to spinning yarn, drinking his own piss and
There is method in
our apparent madness. You see, Gandhi was pretty much the opposite of
what we’d think of as hard man, but he faced violence everyday of his
life. He understood violence as well as anyone ever has and knew how to
overcome it. How to be a winner.
I cannot teach you
violence, as I do not myself believe in it. I can only teach you not to
bow your heads before any one even at the cost of your life.
In Fight Club,
Edward Norton says if he could fight a historical figure, he’d fight
Gandhi. Good answer says Brad. Wrong. Bad answer. Very bad.
nothing and no-one. If he saw trouble kicking off, he would confront
those involved and offer to let them beat him up instead of each other.
Usually, this would puzzle people so much they would lose the will to
batter each other. His interventions made street scrappers feel just
Imagine about the
meanest fighter you’ve ever seen. He’s giving you the worst beating of
your life. Every bone in your body aches, you’re bleeding, your head’s
thumping and he’s standing over you with a killer’s grin. Gandhi did
that every day. Only he was facing the might of the British Empire (for
the benefit of younger readers, this was an organisation even more
powerful and ruthless than the UFC). Imprisonment, beatings, starvation-
whatever they threw at him, he would keep getting up. Kind of like a
cross between Cool Hand Luke and a really feeble bag of bones with crap
possibly on points.
It has always
been a mystery to me how men can feel themselves honoured by the
humiliation of their fellow beings.
arrogance, twatishness- whatever name you give it, it has the same
Gandhi defeated the
most powerful Empire in world history after a bitter campaign lasting
many years. When the Union flag was lowered for the last time and India
was granted independence, how do you think he reacted?
Did he pretend to
dig the grave of the British Empire then theatrically jump up and down
Did he appear on TV
plastered in adverts and drinking a sponsored drink, name checking every
company that helped his revolution?
Did he grab the
MC’s microphone, call the badly injured British Empire a pussy who isn’t
in his class and then mouth off about how he was too good for the assembled crowd to
Did he slate the
promoters of independence as pricks and say you wouldn’t see him in
dumps like India anymore?
Of course he didn't.
Strength does not come
from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.
Gandhi knew that
it’s not the muscles that win fights. Sometimes it’s not even the brains
and technique. When it’s on top, it’s all about the heart. Obviously,
there are exceptions to this rule. You wouldn’t bet on Helen Keller to
submit Ian Freeman or Stephen Hawking to drop the Ice Man, but you get
and courtesy are added to strength, the latter becomes irresistible.
Take this to heart
and you will become:
a better fighter
a better man/woman
delete as applicable
Poverty is the worst form of violence
Gandhi could see
the bigger picture. Lack of bread and opportunities keep you down, not
the stick. If you’re hungry enough you can always attack and take that
from the Man.
leaders lack this sense of perspective. If Gandhi ran a council in 2007,
he’d be concerned about getting decent housing, healthcare provision,
jobs and leisure facilities for the people in his town. Once that was
sorted he’d mend the roads and sort out the public transport. In short-
he’d struggle eradicate the causes of poverty to enhance the lives of
his people. He’d be putting his soul into the fight against real
violence: that carried out against the vulnerable in society.
Gandhi would not
waste his time banning MMA shows from his civic halls.
Gandhi would not
puff himself up and appear on every media outlet that would have him
giving ill informed views on something as trivial MMA in order to grab a
some cheap headlines while there was one person living below the poverty
line in the borough.
Gandhi would be in
favour of something that made young people determined to better
themselves through endeavour. Given the choice between being a two bob
rentaquote council hypocrite or a martial artist, Gandi would cast off
his cloth, don a pair of Tapout shorts, climb in the cage, bang his
chest like a silverback, let out an ear splitting roar then take on all
comers with his secretly honed leg lock techniques. (probably)
Gandhi- Visionary -
Quiet tough guy – Bloke worth listening to
More Gandhi wisdom
It is better to be
violent, if there is violence in our hearts, than to put on the cloak of
nonviolence to cover impotence.
A coward is
incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave.
Glory lies in
the attempt to reach one's goal and not in reaching it.
striving to be the best is man's duty; it is its own reward. Everything
else is in God's hands.
It is any day
better to stand erect with a broken and bandaged head then to crawl on
one's belly, in order to be able to save one's head.
Live as if you
were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
lies in the effort, not in the attainment, full effort is full victory.
knows no considerations.
The greatness of
a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated.
Gandhi, what do you think of Western civilization?"
Gandhi: "I think it would be a very good idea."